God Save the Queen

Baby put on his special suit yesterday for Queen Elizabeth's 80th birthday jubilee. He will be joining the gala at Windsor Castle to present her with some of his left-over Easter candy.

"I picked Cadbury's, which I think she will appreciate as a company that operates in the British empire," said Baby.

When asked what he will say to the revered figurehead when presenting his gift, he said, "Happy Birthday, Queen."

Baby advised that her likely response will be, "Cheers, possum."

Facing puzzled looks, Baby explained, "She's always called me 'possum'."

Jesus Killed the Dinosaurs?

Who knew a recent trip to the Natural History Museum in New York City could lead to a Bible lesson from Baby? Strolling through the dinosaur exhibits on the fourth floor, he spiced up an other wise lackluster fossil tour with a smattering of prehistorical facts.

"Jeebus came to earth to destroy the dinosaurs," advised Baby, pointing to a reconstructed tricerotops. "He saved us from our sins and the threat of human extinction at the hands of carnivorous beasts. Jeebus came to stand for mercy, forgiveness and upright vertebrae."