Joseph called me a "sucka," today, saying I can't handle the hardcore street life we brings to my world.

Faux Memories

Joseph has long treasured his childhood memory of watching a NASA shuttle take off in Florida in the 1980's. But according to his Dad today, that memory is a falsehood--Joseph only saw the blast-off on television while sitting at home. Despite his father's protestations, Joseph refuses to believe that he manufactured the memory. On top of it, he insists that he also saw a murderous baby shark at the beach later that same day. "Even baby sharks can be killers," he advised solemnly.

Framed

After planting a pair of his own "unmentionables" under my pillow, Baby turned down the sheets before bed and made a grand show of his "discovery." Unfolding the garment before my eyes, he made no small number of accusations. How could I? What was I thinking? My integrity was roundly denounced and my motives questioned.

Pen-Pals with Prisoners

Baby sent a personal note to Judy Miller of The New York Times last week, who is now imprisoned at a Federal Detention Center in Alexandria, VA. He wanted to express his outrage at her incarceration for refusing to reveal her source in the Valerie Plume case. She wrote a personal note in response, thanking him for his support. It must have been the only note she received on Hello Kitty stationery!

Supreme Court Baby?

Joseph is wondering if Bush will nominate him to the Supreme Court tonight. He hopes he will "win." I suppose it's between him and the two Ediths. If Joseph wins, I'm sure his first point of order will be to bring back the judicial wig.

Dumb Trip to Jersey

Baby was patient as I dragged him on a fruitless trip to Edison, NJ today. Instead of taking the train to the Madison Hotel in Morristown, where my cousin's engagement party was taking place, I led us on a dumb trip to the town of Edison--with gifts in tow. Realizing my mistake, we returned to Chelsea and forgot about the whole thing. As you can see in this train pic, Baby made the most of it by reading a novel.

Baby Home Alone

Baby is home alone this week while I learn about computer memory chips in Silicon Valley. Will he get into trouble? What will I come home to?

Sonic Toothbrushes

Why does Joseph hate sonic toothbrushes? I love mine. Each night I spend a good five minutes gently brushing away food debris, while he casts disapproving looks and cleans his teeth manually. Baffling.

My anniversary with Baby

It's Tuesday. Three happy years spanning Salt Lake to NY. What should I get him? He's been hinting about a diamond palm tree from Tiffany's, but I know it would get wrapped in a box and packed under the bed, reserved for special viewings.

Baby at the Beach

Joseph and Clare on the boardwalk in Belmar, Jersey Shore. Clare came home with piles of sand in her suit, in addition to seawood and a piece of a salami that blew from a neighborhooring picnic. Joseph managed to emerge a clean teen.

Park Avenue Baby

Baby taking a moment on Park and 83rd after petting puppies and buying chocolate-covered gummy bears.

After strolling through the shaded streets Baby remarked that the "Upper East Side" designation should only refer to those rich neighborhoods spanning Park and 5th Avenues along Central Park. Everything East of Lexington, Joseph suggested, should no longer be called the UES. How dare this region try to rob the UES of its cache?

Eating Figs

From Baby this morning: "I ate a really rotten fig. It was good but nasty." Why is he eating figs? "I just came across one and ate it. Things happen."

Baby Rock Climbing

Baby's not just a fashionista, he's an avid outdoorsman. Tres Versatile.